"scared of commitment"...

I've thought about writing about relationships many times. I have no PH.D, nothing that makes me an "expert" in relationship, but what I do have, that many women in the dating world seem to lack...is common sense. I haven't always been there. It took me finding my husband and reading a few books to see the big picture! I constantly get questions from my friends regarding things their guy, or potential guys have done and followed by some form of the same question...."what does that mean"....ok we've been told this since Kindergarten and it stands true today....GUYS ARE SIMPLE CREATURES.... specifically there are few hidden meanings to what they say, but the ones that are "hidden", we should be able to read right through...I.e. "I'm scared of commitment"...MAYBE that holds a TINY ounce of truth to it. As humans we're all scared of commitment...TO THE WRONG PERSON....so what this screams is that "I really dont' want to commit to you, circumstances have just been throwing us together and while I don't want to end up bored and lonely, I thought I would give "us" another try". In the meantime, the girl has dropped all of her plans in hopes that THIS TIME they will "click" and move on to happily ever after. It's NOT going to happen! Do I think guys absolutely can NOT change? No way...but when you've been through this 3 or 4 times, perhaps one should stop to consider that this happens when he is bored. Look at the pattern.

There is a book out there that I recommend to almost all of my single friends. It's called "why men love bitches". And it couldn't be more true. Not a bitch in the sense of a mean girl but in the sense of a girl who KNOWS what she wants, who isn't going to compromise her standards and certainly isn't going to drop everything last minute because we have to no life, to accomodate his last minute attempt at a booty call. This was SUCH an eye opening book for me. And when I read it I felt completely mortified that I'd not seen the facts before. None of these guys were any different than one another and THAT was the problem,...They werent' even BAD guys...but they were doing exactly is in their nature, as men, to do...and I was allowing it! They were all the same song second verse, and when things turned around for me was when I turned around my way of thinking. When I decided that, hey, I want to be more than a phone call when he's bored. So those are the first of today's thoughts....no, he's not really that scared of commitment...he just doesn't want to commit to you...period...the end....so quit giving him chance after chance in hopes that he's "changed".